Wednesday, December 18, 2002

 
When Solomon said there was a time and a place for everything, he had'nt encountered the problem of parking his automobile. Especially during the holidays.
posted by Cyril et Marie 7:23 pm

Thursday, December 12, 2002

 
Why is it that is seems like the people who have naturally curly hair are so bubbly?!? Even if you don't know them, just by the way they walk or act, you can tell that that curly person is so damn happy!! I mean we categorize blonds as being stupid, why shouldn't curly people be categorized as happy people?!?! The perfect fact to proove this: if you dress up as a clown, automatically, you'll wear a curly wig and what is the main purpose of clowns? To make people laugh!! Marylin Monroe had curly hair and was always smiling on her pictures.... hum.. o.k. maybe booze and medicine had something to do with this one!!! But Roberto Belini, who played in "La vista bella" made everyone laugh and smile at life with that movie and he has curly hair!! And I betcha if Buddha had hair, it would be curly! Moral of this story, for the next elections, we should choose a president with curly hair, cause if he turns out to be just as bad as the other ones, at least he'll make us laugh!!
&:o)
posted by Cyril et Marie 5:25 pm

Tuesday, December 10, 2002

 
I wanna be a kid again. Last night insomnia took over my beauty sleep and decided I was gonna have a general life crisis. I realized how much it was fun to be a kid. I mean, when you're just a little munchkin, the worst thing that can happen to you is to loose your favorite HotWheel, and the best thing that could happen to you is to spot a baby rabbit in a forest. Christmas time is the best time of the year. Everyone can be your friend, and if you get into a fight, you forget about it 5 minutes later. You don't have to worry about anything because your mommy is there to comfort you, spoil you and make you feel better, while your daddy protects you, shows you new things like building a doll house out of scratch, and how to ride a bike. You think the word "politics and government" are flower names, and you think you can buy a house with 100$. Finding the trap to the attic in your house changes your life and equals endless hours of "make pretend" with your friends. The saddest moments on T.V. is seing your favorite cartoon character getting pushed in a ravine.
But as you add candles to your birthday cake, you realize all the details about life that you never noticed, or never understood. You find out that the guy who lives next door and who seemed like the nicest guy, actually beats the shit out of his wife. You've got 3 uncles on your father's side who are drug addicts and your grandfather was an alcoholic. "Shit hits the fan" becomes more and more familiar in your vocabulary. Christmas time means to use-up your credit cards and try to find a freakin' parking space at the mall. You realize how much your parents were right about everything. You don't understand how your mom manages to cook, clean and do the laundry at the same time. 100$ doesn't even last a week in your wallet, and you try to figure out a way to budget everything you have to pay for. And when your day is almost over, you sit in front of the T.V., exhausted, and what do you watch? The news who shows you all the bad sides of this world, the murders, the wars, tax increase, less employees in the hospitals, people dying of a new virus blablabla.... And when you become an elderly person who is aching, almost deaf and blind, who can only move with a wheelchair, you look silently at this new generation who is taking over our planet, and the society who is getting worst every day. Kids don't play with wooden horses no more, they play cops and robbers with guns. So basically, life ain't gonna get better for no one so might as well appreciate those small things in life and look at them with the eyes you used to have when you were young; a christmas tree is not just a regular tree, it's a magical element of an amazingly happy moment. Carpe Diem
posted by Cyril et Marie 5:32 pm

 
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

posted by Cyril et Marie 2:31 pm

Monday, December 09, 2002

 
I love my friends!!! This morning my best buddy Daniel called me up all excited because Mister has found THE perfect girl and the best part is... she lives right next door to him! He's really crazy about her but doesn't even know her name or if she has a boyfriend... this is the part where I get involved in the situation. Because apparently I'm full of imagination and willing to do pretty much anything for Hagen Däaz, I now have gotten myself in a plan where I have to go knock on that girl's door, pretend to be someone from the government who is making an update of everyone living in the neighbourhood, ask her a bunch of questions like her name, her age, if she is living by herself etc etc.. Why am I such a freak?!?!
posted by Cyril et Marie 7:16 pm

Friday, December 06, 2002

 
Last night I went with a couple of my girlfriends to this crappy little hunter's bar filled with hairy men full of testosterone and ready to attack. We were sitting at our table sipping our drinks and listening to the anoying song of Las Ketchup when this guy comes up to me and says:
HIM "hey what's up?" .
Now that is something I cannot stand. If you're a guy and we're in a bar, do NOT approach me. That's probably one of the only time you'll see my cruel side. and I won't give any warnings.
So I look him in the eyes and say
ME "what?"
HIM "how's it going Valerie?"
ME "Nice try buddy, my name ain't Valerie. And I'll make things easier for you, I have a boyfriend. Bye now."
So he blushes and all shy he answers
HIM "oh my god, I'm so sorry, I really thought... I.....never mind"
And then he leaves. So I'm sitting there thinking, oh shit, I think he really did thought I was someone else, he looked so embarassed poor guy, maybe I was a little bit to harsh on him... Then I start wondering if I should go appologize to him and my friends are all like "Damn Marie, I think you broke that guys heart, he looked so innocent and sweet!!" When all of a sudden, the bartender comes up to me with a beer and says "this is from Martin, he says he's sorry for the mix up and wants to make it up to you" I look around the bar to spot him, and when I finally do, I find him staring at me all horny and he winks at me...
Moral of this story: If a guy talks to you in a bar, it's not because he thinks you look friendly or because it's a coïncidence, it's because he wants to get laid. Never trust a guy with a beer in his hand.
Asshole
posted by Cyril et Marie 5:00 pm

Wednesday, December 04, 2002

 
Stupid fucking avocado seeds!!! It's been 6 months now since I've been trying to grow an avocado tree with numberless techniques and all sorts of different kinds of avocado seeds and NOTHING!!!! How am I supposed to raise a child in this society if I can't even grow something out of a seed?!?! Damn. And plus, I eat so many avocados that I could've saved enough money to go on a trip with that tree! I even tried talking to it cause apparently it helps... oh shit, maybe it doesn't understand French?! Oh shit, of course... avocados come from central america. Oups! O.k. I don't think it has anything to do with it but hey, I have to try to find something to blame it on!! Forget it, I'll try something else... a peanut tree?! Oh, wait, peanuts actually grow IN the ground. Hum...
posted by Cyril et Marie 8:25 pm

Tuesday, December 03, 2002

 
If there were in the world today any large number of people who desired
their own happiness more than they desired the unhappiness of others, we
could have paradise in a few years.

posted by Cyril et Marie 8:35 pm

Monday, December 02, 2002

 
Just got back from lunch. I had a grilled cream cheese, seafood dip, mushroom, lemon and swiss cheese sandwich, squeezed all together. I'm DEFINITELY going to do the groceries tonight *burp*
posted by Cyril et Marie 7:32 pm

 
TYLENOL. That was basically my breakfast this morning. Last night was my christmas party at the restaurant I work for (job #1) and I had almost forgotten the side effects of these 2 words: Open-Bar. Top that with incredibly orgasmic FREE food, a fellow co-worker impersonating Elvis in front of everyone, the Big Boss lighting up a joint and passing it around to everyone (28 people in total), and you've got yourself a pretty fucking crazy night!!! I was used to the really lame office parties (job #2) where everyone pretends to have fun and because you find nothing in common with each other, the main topic of the night is always work related. And the supervisor tries to be funny by telling the same stupid stories she always tells to everyone and you feel the obligation to laugh because she's the boss and she can be a bitch sometimes and you don't want that. But that wasn't what last night was all about and I'm pretty glad! But I think I went a little crazy on the red wine cause even after brushing my teeth 3 times, my mouth is still purple today. If people ask, I'll just say I drank grape Crush (sick).
posted by Cyril et Marie 5:42 pm